I used to do ALOT of grass. Episode 1
No not that kind, Not the Snoop Dogg kind ! Cutting it , maintaining it ... landscaping ect . This is a story how I got screwed by Tim , no dinner , no movie .... just screwed.
While the world sleeps .....
My title was a Monocotyledon reduction engineer, WTF is that you ask ??? Well the translation, Grass cutter. Monocotyledons are blade of grass . I’m cutting grass .... ok not that funny I know. Many moons ago I had a landscaping maintenance company, mainly on commercial properties the odd residential home too. When I first started I broke lots of car windshields, back window, side windows ect. You see in spring the gravel would be on the side of the grass from the harsh icy winter. As well as I power swept the grass to reduce the amount of sand and gravel, always some remained. So I had my business card and Apple auto glass card on me at all times, I would walk out and apologize hand them the cards and say go get it fixed. Apple glass would just charge me
I soon realized that I had to cut grass at night to stop all this mindless auto glass violence. This is where all my stories come from.
Wild things happen when the world is asleep !
I’ve had police helicopters come, fallen asleep at the wheel so to speak even drive off the curb and into traffic, trailers disconnect from the truck ... oh the list goes on and on. So one night a man approached me, looked like a regular dude. He says “I’m Tim , I have cigarettes for sale, do you some cheap smokes?” Well I don’t smoke but both my parents did so I said
“$100 for 4 cartons” he says. Now at the time I think 1 carton was $40-45 ? So I tell him “I’ll take 8 cartons” He hops in my truck and we go to a Shady little motel on the side of the hyw coming into the city, about 10 min from where I was working. I remember being so excited that I got such a smoking deal on the cigarettes. I stop put it into park he jumps out and I give him the money $200, he runs off behind the motel. I notice he left his jacket in my car, I was some how warmed inside that he left it. Because he wouldn’t leave his jacket if he was robbing me. He comes back to the truck sits inside and says “they will need 5 min to find the brand I want.” So we made small talk, about the weather , working night shift ect ... he said “I’ll go check on your order, be right back Gord” Off he goes behind the motel ......
Well I realized I got scammed, 😡 I noticed when he left the truck this time he took his blue denim jean jacket. Tim, if that’s his name, fucked me ... Yep he’s not coming back. What was I to do, go the police and say I was trying to buy illegal cigarettes and I got scammed. Nope so help me wave it good-bye, put your hand in the air like Ralph here and wave good bye to my $200.
Thanks for reading, untill the next one ❤️
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